Saturday, May 8, 2010

Awards, Issues, and Policies!

Nicky, my beautiful and soulful daughter at "We Work For Cheese" has given me a glorious "Sunshine Award". I'm too full of emotion to even express what this means to me. She is a Goddess among woman, a shooting star, an enigma and a holy personage in my book. I adore her and have asked Nicky and all those kids she went and had to come and live with me. I think Alex (my husband) will support us all, but in case he can't, smart young boys can be put to work, no doubt! One of her son's Jake is obviously a genius and Alex will be a good influence in making sure this guy gets rich and famous!

There are a lot of directions attached to this award, and unfortunately, I am very challenged when it come to directions. I try, but usually I am not successful in following them. People may think I am dumb (as in stoopid not speechless) because of this, but I assure you that is not the case. I just cannot do multiple things in a row since it's not how I think.

One thing I remember is that I can choose up to 12 people to share the award with. Okay here goes:

Mike, at Too Many Mornings. He's strange but very attractive to me. (And to Nicky, from what she tells us.) He's so good at just lighting up the blogosphere!

There's Sammy at "To Unravel". Simply hot.

There's my darling girl at "How Much Longer Till Friday". She is the funniest and funnest girl I know! I simply love her.

Ziva of Ziva's Inferno, who I would give a butt transplant to, if she needed one! (But we all know that gorgeous green Fin has a perfect ass already.)

Laura at The Purse Blogger who is an adorable and gorgeous woman married to a very smart guy who has passed the BAR on the first try.

Lee at Token Blogger who rocks my world with her amazing talent and beauty!

Jen at Redhead Ranting who should have called herself "Ravishing Redhead" since that a lot more descriptive.

Jayne of In Jayne's World who is my idol. Enough said.

My darling Jay, (Cynical Bastard) who I love as a son. He's witty, smart and oh so studly! Jay is the best ride at the amusement park!

I'm not that great at counting either. So if I am doing a tally wrong, that's life!

I also love Terry at Oh For Pete's Sake and her gorgeous sister Kat at 2010 Year of Miracles. Another one of my girls is Menopausal New Mom who may be meno but she is one hot chick! Are you guys counting, because I am not! I really can't forget Glamazon at Glamazon Mormon Mom either. Or Suzicate (Water Witch's Daughter) or Peg (Square Peg in a Round Hole). There is also Dual Mom at We're at Dad's That Week and she rocks my world. There are many more but I'm sure I'm giving this to a few more than allotted already! So sue me!

My last two Sunshine awards have to go to Harry and Honey. I realize they don't really have blogs, but they are the sunshine of my life too!

Friday, May 7, 2010


Glamazon, I changed my mind. I have to do the confession thing after all.

I think this Friday evening I'm going to talk about sins of omission. Seems that is something we tend to forget about, but we shouldn't. When hubby asks what happened to the $100 he gave you yesterday and you shrug, you are leaving him with the impression that you did something necessary and expensive with it. You are not saying that you spent it on buying cuban cigars for Jacques. Now that's the kind of thing I'm talking about.

I love to entertain. I have a number of photos on here showing my pretty dining room. I am very happy with how these photos show off my nice room, and the wonderful floral arrangements in it.

Lookie here:

Okay, now this is simply lovely isn't it! I love to show off! Oh yeah, showing off is great. The only problem is that while my dining room is indeed gorgeous, my kitchen is totally ridiculously ugly. It's so ugly I want to show people the bathroom before the kitchen. The stove and refrig are shoved against each other. Now how pretty is that? Since I'm on an honesty kick, here is the photo:

Now how delightful is this? Not very, right? So it is a sin of omission not to show it? I have invited a lot of people to my house. I have to make them wear blindfolds when I take them into the "Kitchen From Hell". You can see I do have a mess of clean dishtowels (or maybe not clean, who the hell knows) hanging on the end of my Cost Plus poor girl's island. I also have 3 or 4 bottles of wine in the wine rack built into the little cheapie island.

The counters? Yeah, what you see is what you get. In other words, totally inadequate. The little room off the the left back corner of the photo is a pantry and that part is good. Another thing that is good is the breakfast nook that overlooks the garden. It's a goofy kitchen.

Now do I care? Yes, I care. I care very much. But there is something going on here besides the fact that re-doing this would cost from $50,000 to $150,000, it's my emotional inability to live in a torn up house for a couple or six months. I get so nervous with workmen, ladders, hammers, power tools, dust, and general upset environs that I would end up in the HOME for a year or two. So when I show you pretty stuff, remember my proclivity for sins of omission!

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Leaky Brains

It's been a couple of weeks since this started. I had a bloody nose a while ago and it scared the shit out of me . I even went to the doctor and he cauterized my delicate (okay big) nostril.

Today, I was singing to Honey. She loves it when I sing. Right in the middle of "One Night In Bangkok" my nose started bleeding. I had not been snorting snuff or cocaine. (In fact, I never do that.) Still, my nose was spouting blood.

I'm sorry, but there is no other way to put it. I felt a funny feeling and put my hand up, and oh my God! I did what my doc told me to do and pinched my nose and hung my head over like you do to keep from fainting.

(Believe me, I never did this when I fake fainted because my mother told me to, when we were running away from my evil Dad with my 3 sisters in tow and we had no place to go so Mom always made me faint on the sidewalk while she would go into the Half Moon Bar and Grill and call my dad to come and pick us up because I was fainted "dead away" on the sidewalk.)

I have come to the conclusion that the blood is coming from my leaky brain. This scares me a bit. When I was very young, I had a floating ovary and got sent home from school by the nurse because of it. When I have told doctors' this, they look at me puzzled. Sorry but they don't know everything. There's a reason why they call it the "practice" of medicine. These dudes are just practicing!

Now I think my brain is leaking blood. Some of you may know better than me, are brains bloody? I'm assuming so. I'm not terribly worried because I have lived a good life (as in "a full life"not a "holy and religious" life as I am not a particularly religious woman, but rather a pagan in a lot of ways.) Still, the nosebleed has me troubled.

It came and went. And it's been almost 12 hours since it happened. Still, I can't sleep because I have to keep looking in the mirror to make sure the leaky brain isn't coming out of my eyes or ears too. (That totally could happen.) I keep getting a little tingle in my ears for example which could be related to Alex playing "Prince" really loud earlier or could be part of a leaky brain syndrome.

Now some of my best friends on here are of the nursing persuasion. They may try to tell me not to think this is a leaky brain issue, but I'm just saying ... it totally could be.

Confessions Of A Counterfiet Mexican

This is a photo of me dining with Olivia. Olivia's Mom Kim is a good friend and a neighbor. Kim is a firefighter in San Francisco. She's my hero!

Now, you may notice that we are not at a Mexican restaurant. I really do not like Mexican food unless I make it myself, and I seldom do. There's something about those refried beans that just turns my stomach. I like beans just fine, but don't smash them up and smother them with cheese. That's just nasty.

Also, why do Mexican restaurants goop everything on to the plates. You can't really even tell what's what. Everything is covered in some red or green sauce and has what? More cheese. I love cheese, but I don't want it melted all over my food.

There is nothing like a wonderful goat cheese with truffles. A lovely brie can make the sun shine brighter. But all that gloppy cheese melted all over Mexican stuff is just ridiculous.

If you push me a little further, I have to admit I'm not a fan of tequila either. Alex and I had a physical fight many years ago after drinking tequila. No harm was done because we were too drunk to do any harm, but we did swing in the direction of each other. When we awoke the next morning, we both knew we had been possessed by tequila. We never did that again. The occasional margarita is fine, but shots! Oh no thank you! Not ever.

Now I have to also confess that I am not a fan of Mexican beer. I much prefer German beer. Sorry, it's just better beer!

When I was in Mexico many years ago with a blue eyed husband, people would speak to me in Spanish. (Yes, I had black hair and much darker skin because I tan very easily.) When I would shake my head and tell them "No habla", they would look at me like "uh huh! Sure you don't speak the language! Not around your white boyfriend anyway!"

I do know a few words and phrases. I know how to ask "Where are the black cats" for example. This could be something I might need to ask if I'm in a neighborhood that is heavily Latino. It just shows that I do know something. In case you ever need to know, just ask "Donde estas los gatos negros?" and people will know you are trying.

I had a Mexican boyfriend once. I was trying to compliment him and said "El Grande Deeko". He thought I was calling him a big dick, but not in a good way.

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

What The Hell, and How Did That Happen?

My next door neighbor, Mary, has three dogs. One is a 2 year old Rhodesian Ridgeback named Dutch who has been neutered. Dutch and my Harry are the best of pals. They are both big, and a red orange color so people really have trouble telling them apart unless they are close enough to see Dutch's ridge down his back.

Sansom is a pug and he's about 6. He has never been neutered. He's a little on the fat side, (like most pugs), but he's cute. Mary recently added Delilah to the mix. Delilah is a French Bulldog and about 8 months old now. She's a very loving girl! Delilah runs up to people, throws herself down on the ground and puts her legs in the air just at the idea that someone will speak to her. In other words, she's sort of a free and easy female.

Mary and I went to the coffee shop around the corner this morning for Swedish pancakes. Yummers! When we got home, a neighbor guy came over to say hello and to ask if he could borrow Sansom. He was joking but claimed that he loved Pugs more than any other kind of dog! (He's Chinese and the Pug was in China and full sized before it went to England and got to be a tiny dog through breeding.)

Mary let her dogs out of the yard and Dutch and Sansom ran out, followed closely by Delilah! Uh, what's up with Delilah? She's gotten very fat! When she rolled over on her back, all of her nipples were engorged. Uh, Mary, what's up with your dog? Is she preggers?

Mary said "Oh no! She can't be pregnant! She was in heat, but I watched them pretty carefully." Uh huh. "Pretty carefully" can end up "slightly pregnant" is my experience. This little girl is young to be a mother. But she's probably going to be one. And the cross between a Pug and a French Bulldog may be interesting. Of course, maybe Sansom is not the culprit in this case. I did see Delilah taking herself for a walk on several occasions during the last couple of months!

I know it's not Harry's spawn because he is neutered, plus, if you can put judgments on things like this, I also think he's gay. Harry and Dutch have way too much fun humping each other!

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

My Pride, My Joy, My Cyrus

From three minutes after his Cesarean delivery into the world, 17 years ago, this guy has owned my heart. I thought I would never feel that amazing love I felt for my own children again, but I was wrong.

Every thing about him delighted and amazed me. Cyrus is one in a million.

He's my best friend. I know that I hold a special place in his heart and he knows that he is my heart. If we go to a party when the family is there, Cyrus holds my arm to make sure I won't stumble. He brings me my diet coke without me having to ask for it. He is so attentive that it's amazing. To him, a Grandmother is a very special thing. I treasure him!

Several weeks ago, he got into a fight at school. Well, sort of a fight. He and a couple of friends were fooling around and he told one of the guys to "shut the F up". The guy said "Say that to me again". Cyrus did. The guy punched him in the mouth.

Cyrus is a big boy. He's strong as an ox and works out. The other boy hit him again in the gut telling him to "fight back" and "man up". Cyrus told him "You're my friend and I won't hit you." The guy who was hitting him quit and walked away saying he was going to call his mother to come and pick him up.

Cyrus was terribly upset over this event. When he told me, he was having trouble controlling his voice. I ached for him so much. He was not physically hurt or in pain, but the emotional side of this fight just broke his heart.

I was so proud of him I couldn't see straight. He behaved in exactly the right way considering the circumstances. Fighting at school can get you thrown out of school. Cyrus wasn't willing to take that risk. Also, he knew that his friend was upset about something else and taking it out on him. The other guy apologized the next day. They are still friends.

He has a philosophy that is so important. "High school is great, but it's not my real life. My real life is ahead of me. Good times, bad times now, but they aren't really that important. I'm waiting for my real life!" God I love him!

Cyrus's triumphs are my triumphs, his pain is my pain. I adore all of my grandchildren, but only have one who owns me.

Monday, May 3, 2010

The Spring Has Sprung

All around the "hood" tulips are blooming, daffodils are showing their colors, the cherry trees have shown their colors and are in repose until that magical 3 weeks next year. Dang!

My rose bushes in front of the house look amazing! There are reds, pinks and whites out there crowding each other for center stage!

Last week I was bitching about cold and rain. Today, I'm too hot. I am so spoiled temperature-wise. I want the temperature between 67 and 72 and partly cloudy. It's all brilliant blue today and about 74. Way too warm for me. (I know. I know. I know.)

We have 3 big Honey Locust Trees in our garden. These trees have gorgeous white flowers and they rain in the breeze from May to July. I love breezy days that rain flowers! It's so cool! The Honey Locust trees have really evil thorns though. Have to be careful with those branches when they blow down.

Honey's favorite thing is taking sunbaths. Harry has red hair and guards his fair complexion at all times, so he prefers the shade always. I like a little sun, but I'm careful with it. I used to spread baby oil or olive oil on me and lay in the sand at the beach on hot days. Ancient history, but I still refuse to completely hide from the sun. Sun blocks are okay but they smell funny. Never mind. Only one sniffing me right now is Harry. And he likes funny smells!

Tonight I want to use the barby for ginger laced pork chops! Cucumber salad and jasmine rice! Oh baby! There's something about cucumber that just says Spring and Summer!

Sunday, May 2, 2010

This Is What Happens To Bad Guys At Our House

Alex is not a small guy. Harry is not a small guy. When they play tug of war, Harry wins. When the cable man walks in without knocking, Harry wins. I doubt many bad guys would be a match for Harry.

If you enlarge the photo, you can see the terror in Alex's eyes! I'm glad he was wearing a training glove or he might have lost his hand.

The thing is, Harry was just playing here. If he's playing, it's bad enough. When he's serious, it's worse.

After we bathe Harry, I hold up a towel for him. I had better be sitting down when I do it. Harry pretends he's a bull and I'm a matador. The first time, he knocked me on my butt! Now I know enough to hold the towel off to the side.

The boy means no harm. He's just big and strong and playful. (Oh, and there's goofy too, but I left that off.)

Now, if you really want to hear about goofy, I"m going to do a little bit on my husband now. Lord knows, I love the man, or I would have poisoned him a long time ago. Alex's company is offering a new health insurance plan and we need to make our decisions about it by mid week.

In going through the options, one is fairly reasonable. One is medium expensive. And one is pretty expensive. Alex's says, "why don't we just get the cheap one?" Well, baby, there are reasons that you need to look and compare what is being offered. "Why?" "Let's just get the cheap one."

The "cheap one" gives you "some benefits" after you pay about $1000 per person out of pocket. Uh, well, that's fine and dandy. Now add on to that that if you go to an out of "preferred provider" for surgery, (or hospitalization), you'll being paying 40% of both out of pocket. No problem. You need a heart surgeon in the program even if he or she is lousy and doesn't have a license? Check! Now neither Alex nor I are in the 25 year old range (age wise). We may have health issues coming up in the next year.

I told my beloved idiot of a husband to do what he wants. I won't pay for it anyway. He will. Guess what? He changed his mind about which plan to get. Why is it always so hard? Just tell me that!